The Twilight Saga

The whole Twilight Saga has become a worldwide sensation in the past 5 years. The series chronicles a relationship that a human high school girl has with vampire. The series started as books but was made into movies in the past few years. While being a wonderfully romantic series in a non existent magical world that I confess I too have grown to love, I find their relationship to be completely unhealthy and unrealistic. Mainly because Bella knows her relationship with Edward is dangerous and that they shouldn’t be together but she is so drawn to him that she can’t let it go. It is also implied that they are each other’s “one and only.” That neither can live without each other and if one wasn’t to exist the other couldn’t handle being alive. When Edward leaves her she acts like a drug addict going through withdrawals that can’t function or live because he’s not there. Bella also chooses Edward over the better choice, Jacob, who would protect her and she could stay “alive” with. He has way more to offer her in the real world than Edward. She could still see her family and friends, live a realistic life and stay human. But her obsession with Edward is too strong to think clearly apparently.

Sex and the City

This movie definitely deals with several different types of relationships. It also was the follow up to years of hundreds of different relational (not to mention sexual) encounters. I absolutely love this show and the world they live in and I expect most girls would. There are so many beautiful men and so many beautiful clothes it’s every girls dream. It definitely doesn’t hurt that Carrie earns all of this money to live her dream life while writing stories venting over her love sagas. Yet, the world we all fantasize about is completely unrealistic. As well as, the relationships chronicled in this film and shows are horribly unrealistic and detrimental to anyone who dreams to live a life like theirs. In the end of everything, after all of these years, Carrie ends up with her “soulmate” who left her on several occasions and wouldn’t commit to her for years. All because she believes they are destined to be together and he is the one she cannot forget about. Miranda’s husband has cheated on her because she is too busy working to support them to have sex. She then abandons him for several months and moves herself and her son to another part of New York unwilling to speak to him or try to work things out. Charlotte’s first marriage failed because they couldn’t have “good” sex together or conceive a child together and while in their divorce she falls in love with their divorce lawyer who she changes her beliefs for. They later start a perfect quaint little family on the nicer part of town. Last but not least, Samantha the girl who after hundreds of partners could never commit to anything other than sex finally has a steady boyfriend but in the end leaves him for her own happiness because she needs to focus on herself again. All of these very general descriptions of their love sagas don’t get too in detail but completely explain how heinous of an example of love this show is. But, we all still dream that our one and only will come rescue us in Paris from the wrong man.

 

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

This movie seems to be a number of girls favorite rom com. It plays on the idea that girls act crazy and somehow get guys. Kate Hudson’s character does every thing that is supposed to scare a man away in 10 short days yet somehow gets him to fall in love with her. I think one of the main factors people don’t get is that they really fall in love when she has to start acting normal in front of his family and really be herself. All while this is happening Matthew McConaughey’s character is involved in a bet where he has to be the perfect man and make this crazy girl fall in love with him. I think this movie really plays off of the idea that all women are crazy and that men are such pigs that they have to try to be perfect to make a beautiful woman to fall in love with him. Which, I believe to be a false perspective. I think this movie definitely plays off of the stereotypical gender roles that are “ideal” or “expected” from each sex while in a relationship. It’s Hollywood’s portrayal of romance and it’s not always the best or the right portrayal but it gets its point across to the public and they believe that a woman’s crazy behavior is normal or that a guy should kiss his girlfriend’s ass to get her to fall in love with him.

Pretty Woman

Pretty Woman is considered to be a classic by many and I can’t say I’m not one of them. I get excited every time I see it pop up on my TV. This movie started one of many romantic comedies for Richard Gere and Julia Roberts. I personally think they have great on screen chemistry but even in recent days when I see them appear in a film together I can’t help but reference Pretty Woman. The story is one that is unconventional to many love stories and that includes many cliches in love. I think this film is a cross between prince charming saving his damsel in distress and the perfect woman can save a man and make him change his ways.

When Edward picks up Vivian off the streets while asking for directions he has no intentions of sleeping with the hooker. Instead he just wants her company and someone to talk to in his crazy hectic corporate world. While she’s getting paid. Vivian could careless if it meant sitting in his hotel room or not. He in a sense rescued her from the doomed life she led working the streets of L.A. and from ending up a junkie like her roommate. Vivian in turn rescues Edward from the lonely heartless corporate world that ultimately was eating him up. The love from her lower class escort self helps him see a different world. She’s different from the others and gives it to him straight forward instead of his position. In the end the sort of change one and other to mold and integrate one and other into their lives.

This film I consider to be different because of the taboos it touches on such as hookers or the corrupt business world. Where are most films have the all around perfect circumstances for two people to fall in love and live happily ever after.

 

The Kardashians

When one thinks of love in movies and TV I wouldn’t think of the Kardashians. Yet, most of their recent success is based on specials or spin offs of their family in romantic relationships. While they should be no example for anyone to want to follow.

Kris and Bruce: The mother and father of the family obviously the core relationship that made the family who they are today. In the show it often shows Kris and Bruce bickering and Kris walking all over Bruce. She, in a sense, wears the pants in the relationship. She is the founder of the Kardashian brand and is willing to do anything to protect that even if it means abusing the relationship she has with her husband.

Khourtney and Scott: This couple is the most unconventional of the group while dating for many years and being broken up for a while Khourtney discovered she was pregnant after seeing Scott again. So they try to make the relationship work for the sake of the child, Mason. Still to this day they aren’t married and the show seemed to make it sound like Khourtney didn’t want to get married because she doesn’t want Mason to experience the same heartbreak she did when her mom and dad divorced early in her life. This relationship is often in turmoil over the fact that Scott can’t give up his cocky attitude or love of drinking. The fact that they aren’t married makes them cause for many issues in the family as well as for themselves. Their progression over the past few years though has improved.

Khloe and Lamar: Decided to get married after only 9 days of dating. One of the most controversial romances on the show and my personal favorite. They had a huge 2 hour wedding special that attracted tons of attention and many questioned how true their intentions were for one and other. They now have their own spin off and for the most part their relationship is somewhat easy as portrayed on the show. They seems to have tons of playful banter and the TV audiences really feed into them. Khloe being the youngest of the sisters and the most outspoken is often grounded by Lamar’s older, wiser, once previously married, wiser self. Their biggest issue seems to be whether or not their going to try and have children.

Kim and Kris: The newest married couple in the Kardashian clan. Kim the most popular name of the sisters finally found her prince charming after a few short months in Mr. Kris Humphries after years of dating NFL player Reggie Bush. While Kim is often the center of attention and biggest name in the family she seems very diva-esque in their relationship. Especially when it came to the wedding. The two-part special showed their pre wedding jitters in a result of them constantly fighting. Kris challenges Kim’s behavior and I think this is something different for her. Their relationship is my least favorite and what seems like the most rocky. I can’t decide why I don’t like them it may be because I feel like Kim isn’t a real person and more of a fame-seeking robot who isn’t willing to let her hair down and have a little fun.

After looking at all of these relationships and seeing what a prominent force the Kardashians are in today’s pop culture world it bothers me that these ideas of relationships reach so many people and are conveyed as a normal example of what love can be.

Something Borrowed.

This film and book is one that touches on many concepts that I believe are more socially acceptable in today’s world I believe. I read this book before I saw the movie and very much enjoyed it but felt almost torn after being so involved with the story. The story touches on best friends, marriage, cheating, and babies. The foundation of many romantic comedies today. In the story, Darcy and Rachel are life long best friends. While Darcy has always been the louder, outspoken, leader type Rachel has always been the quiter, kinder, loyal friend who followed her around. Turns out that Darcy’s fiance, Dex,whom Rachel was best friends with through out Law School is actually in love with Rachel and they start an affair on the side behind Darcy’s back and fall madly in love with each other. After all is said and done Darcy reveals she was actually cheating on Dex with his best friend who has now gotten her pregnant which in turn leads Rachel and Dex to reveal their relationship. In turn, Darcy causes a scene and storms off ending her engagement and friendship with Rachel. End of movie.

I think that in today’s world movies like this are much more accepted because relationships are much more open then they used to be. Cheating is very much common in the world today and I think that because of stories like this one it almost makes it okay because Rachel and Dex cheated and ended up being in love. This won’t happen to most people. Also, this movie shows the underdog coming up from behind and getting everything she’s always wanted and waited so long for. While the girl we don’t like as much ends up alone, pregnant, and miserable. It’s everybody’s fantasy from middle school come true. The girl who got everything ended up with the crap end of the stick. I like that this movie touches on more contemporary themes today than most movies would. But, at the same time I find it very difficult to believe. I think it almost glorifies infidelity which I don’t agree with at all. As well as, the movie basically says love conquers all, even a friendship that has lasted a lifetime.

Crazy, Stupid, Love.

A movie that I have seen recently is Crazy Stupid Love. I very much enjoyed this movie for it’s all star cast but also for depicting relationship struggles and breaking a few stereotypes. In the film a Cal and Emily are wife and husband who seem to have it all but have to overcome the fact that the wife had an affair with David after only being with each other their entire lives. During a trial separation Steve Carrell’s character Cal encounters player Jacob who teaches him the way to get women. After preaching to never settle down and how to play this ultimate game Jacob himself seems to have met his match in Hannah who had denied him in the past and turns out being Cal’s oldest daughter whom they’d had in high school. In the end they all become one big happy family but not without overcoming all of these obstacles first.

The reason I enjoy this film is because it shows that you have to work at a relationship for it to work. In both relationships it establishes that you need to have a solid connection with one and other to make it work. It’s not just a Hollywood depiction of another couple who works out of lust for one and other. Which is a common misconception many make today when trying to pick a partner. Another reason I really enjoy this film is because it touches on the taboos of separation and having a child while still being a child yourself. Of course the film has its glamorized moments but it has to in order to stay entertaining for an audience.

 

 

The Bachelorette

While being an avid viewer of The Bachelor and Bachelorette I can’t help but cringe every time I view the show. Between the cheesy one liners, dream destination dates, and ability one person has to fall in love multiple times within a two month period I go crazy.  Although, none have driven me farther to crazy town than this past seasons Ashley. I originally watched Ashley in Brad’s second season where I found her to act like a small child fighting for attention any way she could get it. After being 2nd runner up and becoming the new bachelorette she got even worse falling in love at least 3 times on her season. I couldn’t bear the way she didn’t know what she wanted and initially fell for “bad boy” Bentley living up to the age old cliche that every girl wants a bad boy. After he publicly dissed her several times on national television she invited him back so she could get her closure (DUMB). It reminds me of the lyric from No Doubt’s song Bathwater “why do all the good girls, want the bad boys?” Not to mention her need to cry every 5 minutes.

This show is obviously scripted to provide viewers with several ideas. For example, that love at first site exists or that you have one true soulmate out there in the world who you can find on a whim and will sweep you off your feet. Of course, we feed in to it. For Ashley, in the end, J.P. the romantic who was obsessed with her ended up being her one and only. While, they’ve made it longer than many couples on this show its only a matter of time before we see them on Bachelor Pad duking it out like Jake and Vienna. I know I sound like a bitter critic of all things love but shows like this are the reason we think relationships should be a certain way in our fairy tale worlds. But, I know that at no point in time will I ever have the ability nor a husband with the ability to sweep me off my feet every weekend and take me to far off exotic lands, for secluded unique dinners by candle light or horseback on the beach. This show fails to show the real trials and tribulations of a relationship and instead shows two people constantly interviewing each other and miraculously falling in love.

J.P. proposing to Ashley

Beauty and the Beast

Beauty and the Beast is a fairy tale that has been told for decades with an underlying message that says beauty comes from within. Disney made this movie apart of it’s Princess Collection in 1991 and became one of the best known films in their repertoire. With Beauty and the Beast don’t get me wrong because it’s one of my all time favorite movies but I think it creates a horrible idea of love for those who watch it. Especially since it is mostly shown to a younger audience it places this idea in their head at a young age it places unrealistic expectations in their minds. As much as I love to watch this movie still to this day I strongly dislike the message that this beautiful woman can change her destined soulmate from a beast to a prince who will rescue her from obscurity and move her into his beautiful castle . Lets be honest, this is an unhealthy stereotype to prepare anyone with for real life. Of course we all want Prince Charming to come sweep us off of our feet but lets face it, that’s just not going to happen. The idea that a woman can change a man with her love is a common misconception and portrayal in films today. People change at their own free will not because someone made them see the light. Not every man is going to have a huge enchanted castle to make all of your dreams come true. As well as, not every girl is going to be a strong-minded feminist who needs a gentle giant to slow her roll.

Belle and the Beast turned Prince

Many of Disney’s Princess movies create some sort of false imagery and as much as I thoroughly enjoy them I always have to take a step back down to reality after watching them and realize I am not a damsel in distress in need of a prince to rescue me nor, am I a princess as much as I like to believe I am.

Modern Family

Modern Family, a sitcom on ABC, debuted in 2009 to much critical acclaim. The show follows a very comedic modern day family around in a documentary style. I am a huge fan of this show personally. While I find it very entertaining and extremely funny, I think that it also offers true insight to families today. The show is able to break the mold of the nuclear family and touch on many modern day taboos.

The show centers around the families of Jay Pritchett, his son Mitchell Pritchett, and his daughter Claire Dunphy. Jay was once married to Mitchell and Claire’s mother but has since remarried the much younger and sexier Gloria. Even though he already has two kids of his own who are well above 30 he is helping Gloria raise her pre-teen Manny son since his own father isn’t around. Mitchell and his partner Cameron bring the sense of new parents to the table since they have adopted their Vietnamese baby Lily. While, Claire and her husband Phil present the more traditional family and are parents of three Haley, Alex, and Luke. All three segments of this family live within the same suburban neighborhood in Southern California and interact on a daily basis.

I think that this show works because it doesn’t create a false imagery of the perfect couples who don’t fight and have an all around charming life style. They address the fights that a husband and wife have everyday with Claire and Phil. It even goes as far to show divorce and what happens if a marriage doesn’t work out with Jay and then brings in a much younger Gloria into the equation as a new wife. This creates tensions within the family because she was so young and Jay’s children question her intentions with their father. The sitcom also acknowledges the homosexual relationship as parents of Mitchell and Cameron which is something not many networks or television shows are willing to do. I love how this show makes jokes out of everything all families and those in relationships can relate to. I don’t think the show is unrealistic at all which is what more movies and shows need to present. We aren’t  going to ride off in a horse drawn carriage, or have a beast turn back into a prince but, one day we will most likely be married with kids and encountering some of these day to day issues.